Opening my eyes to complete darkness would usually scare the shit out of me but for some reason this time I was not. Everywhere I turned, everywhere I looked there was only darkness. Chills started to go up my spine and threw my chest as if something was encouraged me to look around and explore. Why walk around nothing I thought to myself when while I stretched my arms out in front of me as if I was blind and looking for something or someone to guide me. I do this for what seems like hours. All of a sudden, I felt something cold like how metal feels when its cold outside yet it was soft and smooth like the foam balls we used to use when we played dodge ball in gym class. I didn’t know if I was touching a wall, a window or a door. I was just happy that I was touching an object. So I stopped and started to push.
Really feeling stupid as fuck I got mad and started to punch the object. Then I got that feeling again but it was stronger and it made me breathe heavily. Something inside me told me to turn around. It wasn’t like a real voice. I wasn’t hearing voices. I was more like a feeling; a strong urge to do something without knowing the reason why. So I did and I saw a light. This light was different. I started to walk towards this magnificent light. As I got closer, I started to feel emotions, overwhelming emotions. It felt like the rays of the sun was warming my body, lifting my spirit, and embracing my soul. The color of this light was like nothing I had ever seen before or have I?
When I was 5, It was a Friday night- I remember it like it was yesterday. My grandma always gave me extra homework on Fridays since I was what you called a “gifted child”. Even though I was only 5, I had the Science, Math and Reading grade levels of a 3rd grader. She said I had to stay on my toes. The homework she gave me wasn’t any ordinary homework and she made sure I took my time and answered every question to the best of my abilities. . I wanted to go outside so badly before it got too dark because I was terrified of the dark.
I loved nature, bugs, animals fish; it didn’t matter I loved them all and for some reason they just took to me; all of them. That’s the day I saw the sky turn. The colors were so amazing- Fuchsia, purple and green; all at the same time. As I was catching my last lightening bug my grandma called for me “Lyric Sadé It’s about that time.” Being obedient, she only had to call once. I was a weird kid. I always thought that everyone had a purpose for being and every action and effect had a meaning. The sky being those colors just had to mean something.
“Grandma the sky is beautiful,” I said trying to stay outside as long as I could.
“It sure is little bit. You ready to let your friends go and get ready for bed?” she answered back. Looking down at the jar not ready to let them go yet I replied, “Grandma what does it mean when the sky looks like that?” as I pointed to the sky. Code, she said the sweetest thing a grandma could say when she doesn’t know the answer, “Oh baby that’s just God laughing and smiling down on us and since he’s God, he doesn’t just turn one color, her turns as many colors as he wants.” Being 5 that was a good enough answer for me.
As I reached the radiant light, I was no longer cold. Flashes of light hi at me from every angle like I was the next A list celebrity with a sex tape and TMZ had the rights to my first official statement. But I didn’t get the feeling of being ashamed or disgusted. I felt loved and respected. Looking up to the sky there wasn’t a cloud in sight and those colors fuchsia, purple and green were everywhere. I thought to myself, God is happy. As I looked around and saw all the people so happy; so content it was like I was feeling all of these emotions for myself. Not a car in sight, skyscrapers nonexistent. No one was begging for food or money; everyone getting along. The more I walked, the more I felt.
As the wind blew through my hair and my clothes that I didn’t remember putting on; it’s like the wind carried a message that blew to me then through me then on to the next living creature. The wind whispered “War no more.” I felt my soul smile. Then a teenager and his dad walked passed and the boy asked, “Dad what’s war?” I had this feeling of being worthy, successful and free. Another gust of wind hit me. This time the message carried the feeling of being full. Full of what you might ask; I got the feeling of being full of hope, love, compassion and prayer.
There was no such thing as a poverty line- above or below. Everyone had a purpose- a reason for being. The use of money was no longer needed. Greed, envy, all of the 7 deadly sins were things of the past. Strange foods filled the plates of the cafes that covered the streets yet they smelled so familiar. The streets were not covered in pavement; mostly grass and were people walked there was this material that had the color and durability of tar but if you feel on it you wouldn’t hurt yourself. The only fears were of dying from old age- nothing else. Looking around I thought I had died and gone to heaven.
Just as the sun set you could see the three moons of earth. And a freakishly large planet that looked like Saturn but the rings were very different. The planet looked similar how Earth use to look except there was very little water and the ring s around the planet were all different sizes. As the moons it up the sky, the trunks of the trees and it’s leaves had this luminescent glow to them that started at the tip of the leaves and moved swiftly to the branches, through the trunk and into the grass and ground making the use of street lights not needed. It seems like we now receive nutrients from not only the sun but the three moons as well.
Lightening bugs flew all around me like they use to when I was a kid except these lightening bugs glowed neon colors- pink, orange, yellow, green; my own little bundle of personal fireworks. As they surrounded me, I felt as if these little flying insects were saying, “Thank you thank you thank you!” Then from a far I heard a man with a familiar yet unfamiliar voice say, “My Queen, my Queen it is time.”
Then I woke up
“It’s 8 o’clock I the a.m. and the question of the morning is if you had to sleep with yo boss to keep yo job would you do it. The phone lines are open.” The alarm sounded off to my favorite radio station WJUC. I woke up already late for work. Mad as fuck at myself for letting myself get lost in the same dream I been having since my 21st birthday.
“From the beginning to the end same shit happens every time nothing changes FUCK!” I mumbled and screamed to myself while trying to find all the requirements for my dead end job at Kay Jewelers. It’s not like I needed it. I didn’t have to work if I didn’t want to. It just gave me something to do.
“Name tag, belt, purse, keys, coat,” I said to myself making sure I didn’t forget anything and give the heffa a reason to send me home. “Ring ring,” first time my droid legacy ranged in 3 days.
“What’s it looking like boo,” I said to Denise; my co-worker, partner in crime, best friend.
“Girl the Grinch is catching a hussy fit. He said if you not here in 20 its chopped.” Denise stated word for word of what our manager Josh said. She knew that he really was taking his anger for her out on me. Denise was the type of girl who whooped your ass first then asked questions later. You know fuck your whole world up then want to sit down and talk to you about the shit all after the fact.
Denise was 5’5 creamy looking skin always dressing for success but if you talked to her for more than 5 minutes the hood would come out. She had medium length light brown hair that she always pulled into a pony tail and no matter what she wore she always had the latest and greatest heels and kicks on.
She didn’t put up with no shit; NONE from nobody. Not even our manager. He scared of her but don’t want to admit it. She been late so many times that Josh could fire the entire staff just off her tardiness. And the funny part about the whole situation is she a little white chick no bigger than a buck thirty. But don’t let her looks fool you.
Thank God I live only 5 minutes away from the mall. I got there in plenty of time to stop at Anne’s Pretzel and pick up some goodies for my family.
“Made it,” I said out of breath as I reached the main counter in the back of the store.
“You always got good timing the bitch just went to the bathroom wit his fugly ass. Bet not pee on the seat this time. His ass too old for that shit.” Denise said disgusted. She always have m laughing as soon as I step on the scene.
“Where’s Miles,” I asked kind of confused because usually he’s the one who is first to arrive every morning.
“You already know,” Denise said under her breath as if what I was supposed to know was a secret that the imaginary customers weren’t supposed to hear. There go Miles always trying to get the newest eye candy. He doesn’t even care if the fellas swing that way. I thought to myself. If he likes what he sees, he gone try his hardest to get what he wants. Denise and me started to walk towards the men’s clothing store that was adjacent to ours and there he was; spitting game to the newest employee of Ambocrombre and Fitch.
I must say, Miles was not your ordinary gay man. Matter of fact if you asked him he not even gay he’s trisexual, meaning he’ll try anything at least once. And his looks would make a straight bitch leave her man, a gay bitch go st5raight and a straight man; well let’s just say do something strange for a little piece of change. No lie. Miles had a smile that could bring the life back to a room full of corpses. Some might call him skinny but they never seen him ass naked mm. Miles stands about 6’1; chocolate, smooth skin damn near hairless except for his face but still it’s not much. He really got a baby face. He uses it to his advantage with his beautiful light brown eyes and his long eyelashes.
“I think that’s how he does it,” Denise whispered to me as we scoped out his pimping skills from behind the cell phone case cart.
“How he does what?” I asked intrigued by the tone of her voice. Denise always had a plan, explanation, breakdown of how people work and operate.
“You see, he approach them like he straight, and then gives a signal or something that passes as a compliment….”
“You stupid,” I cut her off.
“Hear me out. Then he starts talking ‘bout sports. He invites the prey over to watch sports or play a game that involves sports…” Denise explained not taking her eyes of neither guy.
“Okay Ms. Nancy Drew what happens next,” I said skeptical.
“Shit I don’t know. I don’t be there when he be crushing the cocoa beans.”
“Wow,” I commented light weight speechless.
Miles turned and headed back towards the store fiddling with his phone. We jumped out behind him.
“So…. What happened?” I asked
“Did you get them digits,” Denise shouted as she slapped Miles on the ass.
“Damn girl let a nigga breathe,” Miles happily said, “and do you have to be so loud. He don’t know I’m tri.”
“Told you,” Denise assured me
“What you mean he doesn’t know,” I questioned, “how you get the digits then?”
“I told him I had the new Madden, boys and their toys,” he proclaimed as he admired the new addition to his many contacts.
“Told you again,” Denise said rubbing her accuracy in my face.
“Oh so y’all just gone disappear and y’all know the store open. Jewelry cases unlocked, y’all just want us to get robbed huh,” Josh barked at all 3 of us. I ignored him as always. This dude was the corniest Nigga alive. Words couldn’t fully express how lame this nigga was. Works in a jewelry store yet every piece he rock is a joke. That imitation shine. Little black dude I call him Gary. I really don’t have to describe him now do I???
You should really listen to this dude have a conversation about females; matter of fact about ANYTHING. One day Miles family stopped through to show love and this nigga just had to be part of the conversation. What he say, “Hell yeah I be havin’ mad bitches at the crib titties all in my face. I had this midget bitch wit the softest ass in the world Mm. Made me feel like a pedophile until I started smackin’ that shit then I felt like her daddy.” Such a shame, always trying to stay face knowing damn well he still a virgin and he grew up and live in Perrysburg.
“Man shut the fuck up and get out my way,” Denise barked back.
“I really wasn’t talking to you,” Josh cowardly replied, “But since I got your attention I wanna talk to you ‘bout yo tardiness. Can we step into my office…” then he thought about it “… matter of fact we can stay out here in front of witness.”
“Aint shit to talk about,” Denise said taking a few steps closer to Josh.
“That’s exactly what I was about to say, look, customers,” Josh hurried off to the nearest person he thought was approaching the store.
“That’s fucked up Kit,” I said feeling bad for him.
“Shit it aint my fault he a pussy. He wanna be mad tell’em be mad at the pussy he came out of.”
“Real Talk,” Miles chimed in.
That’s basically how my days go every day. Sell overpriced jewelry to people while we crack jokes on Gary Fakeman. Same shit until 10 days before my 25th birthday.
No comments:
Post a Comment